That Man

Greg, I'd hardly say you and Margo are on "darling" terms. Last time you met she publicly harangued you. Also, not to criticize your approach here, but she's getting away. Try to steer her away from the door and back to the uhhhhhh hypothetical hospital bed? Also, maybe now's a good time to tell a doctor Margo's not in a coma anymore.

This is Greg Talking, Margo!

Wednesday November 4, 2015

Thursday November 5, 2015

Oh man. The abundance of red milk and Anjou pears can't hide that the artwork has worsened noticeably, even since just the beginning of this week. Poor Frank isn't even signing his name anymore, he's just kind of scrawling his initials. The end is near. 

In the meantime, it's helpful that at least Martin and Eric have different sports coats on now. (Right? Those are different people?) And I do appreciate Greg introducing himself in the most awkward way possible. It's hard to tell from Margo's reaction whether she's sustained some kind of memory loss or she's just a little disoriented from the Thy. Storm or the writing is just so bad, just so bad, why is it ending like this, why, uh huh huh huhhhhhhhhhh....  (NB: that's the sound of me dissolving into tears)

The Man Who Loves You

I like the theories proposed by Rock Doc that we're just entering—or just departing—a dream-like mental state happening inside Margo's head. Which might be a good way of explaining, say, why Margo awoke from her coma bolt upright, perhaps even standing, or why the medical staff allowed her hair to stay in a bun the entire time. But it wouldn't explain the complete disconnect between the dialogue and the artwork, right?

And also, never, not even in my craziest most inventive robot dreams did anyone ever say something like "The man who loves me—where is he?"

Margo Opens Her Eyes

Worst reaction to your friend coming out of a coma ever. Seriously, WTF, Tommie? She's evil. Evil nurse Tommie. I'm calling it.

"Where did who go, Margo? No one's been in the apartmen—I mean, hospital... since you went into your coma! Now just close your eyes... there was no need for you to change into your Green Blazer of Renewed Consciousness... I'm going to give you a little injection to help you sleep better... just relax..."

Good for Her

Tuesday October 27, 2015

Wednesday October 28, 2015

Jesus Christ, we couldn't have Greg coming straight from set and dressed up like a pirate or an astronaut or something? Unless he's working on the newest James Bond movie, The Man with the Cyan Dinner Jacket.

How the heck did Skyler find out about Margo's coma anyway? Snopes? Could be that Margo is such a PR genius that she's using this as an opportunity to get old clients to stop by and maybe give her some sympathy business. Clever girl.

Negativity

Thursday April 23, 2015

 Friday April 24, 2015

I guess that's why the relationship with Margo didn't work.

Uptown

I've said it once and I'll say it again: Hollywood is unforgiving! Are we sure we're not back at the ranch with Jack and Carol?

The Fog

"I won't give the TSA the satisfaction of going back to the airport.  A full body scan?  It's humiliating.  But I'll happily participate with you in the first annual Central Park Three-Legged Mist Race back to my apartment."

Time To Go

As darkness falls across the land (as evidenced by the bright white clouds in the background), two young(ish?) lovers smooch for the last time. I know we're all speculating about the on-set accident that will kill/maim Greg and destroy their love Ethan Frome style/make Greg die, but I think distance is going to be the real killer for these two crazy kids. Especially when you're as young(ish) and good-looking (allegedly) as Greg Cooper. And we've all seen how needy/grabby Skyler is, am I right? Am I?

Is That a Challenge?

Somehow it doesn't seem "You couldn't lose me if you tried" is making Margo feel any better. But the sweet emerald ring she got out of the deal brightens her right up.

For the record, Greg, she can definitely lose you - if she wanted to, she would. This is Margo we're talking about. She will also probably lose you, even if she doesn't try. Just ask her dead fiance. Oh, do you still not know about him? Oops.

Good Idea, Lu Ann

Hey! Hey Margo! It's me, Lu Ann! Hey! I just wanted to remind you that I'm in the strip. Hey, is that Greg Cooper? I thought I was going out with Greg. But that was before Christmas in Dallas! Which I apparently came home from at some point. Anyway, no biggie! I'll just run upstairs and clean up after you. Gosh, it's great to be home!

Constant Craving

OMG!  Margo's engaged to circa early 90s K.D. Lang!  It's the most progressive A3G ever, even bucking tradition by going with an emerald stone on the right hand and introducing the new custom of breaking your betrothed's thumb and pinky as a feat of strength.  And Tommie's no longer the most gender confused character in the strip!  And the professor's chin beard survived unsinged!  It's an early March miracle! 

In my continuing effort to confound Google's data mining of my internet searches, I did an intensive google image search for K.D. Lang and discovered this:

 

It's a little eerie.  At least K.D. classed it up and went for the tie.  Also, I had just googled Ghostface Killah, as I heard him discussed today on Fresh Air on NPR.  MARKET TO ME NOW...

Don't Blame Me

Cliffhanger!! Was it a proposal? Did Margo accept? The only thing we know is they both made it out alive. This sets up days to weeks of potential tension in the plot, which will probably be resolved tomorrow when Margo says something expository like "Sorry I couldn't accept your proposal, Greg, but my work means too much me! Have fun in England. Don't call."

Meanwhile, Frank has giving up on describing a gender for Tommie and has made her just a straight-up eunuch. That is the only explanation for the long sleeve, buttoned-to-the-top, disappearing and reappearing eyelashes and lips look that she's got going on.

P.S. if you didn't see reader J.R. Clarke's rendition of "Goldblazer" in the comments yesterday... well, you really should.

Questions

Yay!  Another rushed A3G engagement that seemingly comes out of nowhere.  What will be the demise of this relationship?  Greg's long shoot in London?  Margo's inability to care about another human being?  Or will the lilac people revolt and throw Greg off the building before he can even get down on bended knee?

Margo's not Lu Ann, so she probably won't say yes, kiss Greg and melt into a halo of light.  Any takers on her flying into a rage?

Honestly, Never

You'll see. It's great! They have these elevator boxes. You just hop in, and the box takes you all the way to the bottom of the building! So much less strain on the knees. We could take the shiny elevator box all the way to the top instead of climbing, but I know your smokey lungs could use a workout!

Definitely Not Clingy

Ah, the early stages of love. I remember when I first started dating my boyfriend and I told him to leave me alone, go to a foreign country, and also "don't call me, I won't call you, bye now!" Sigh... where did the romance go?

Come to London

Now this is how you get rid of a guy in A3G. Without killing him, I mean.

Part one: send him to London! MI6 is calling, Greg. You'd better answer! There's only so many scenes we can film here before the movie starts looking "too New Yorky" and "not Britishy enough." Plus the buildings here keep diappearing.

Part two: make Margo care about her job! LOOK, Greg, Margo is a working woman. She has loads of clients (potentially), a boatload of PR events to attend (if she feels like it), press releases to write (when she gets around to it), and Google searches to run (BINGO!). And someone is going to have to passive-aggressively welcome Skyler when she comes crawling back from Aunt Cathy's PR Palace. E... Even though she should probably be in London too.

Part three: dial back Margo from feisty to gloomy! (AKA "pull a Tommie") It's like the ultimate turnoff. Margo is says, "There aren't many days left," referencing her upcoming death due to lung failure/the apocalypse and Greg is just like, "Gee, sweetie, wish you could come to my flat with me! Call me! No texting or Skype though! K? Gotta go, byyyyyyye!"

Say It Again Sister

Margo couldn't have expressed more perfectly how I feel about this "storyline."  I suppose I should care, but I don't.  But I have to because Maggie was all like "Oh, I feel like the blog needs different voices, you guys make me laugh so much, you'll be great at posting!"  And I'm the one sitting here on Tuesday night trying to think of pithy, funny comments about this yawn of a strip while she's probably watching DVRed episodes of Ru Paul Drag Race in her pajamas eating something delicious.  Well played my friend, well played.

The Trial

You can tell it's a few weeks later because, my god, look how faded Greg's yellow jacket is. Evan must've had to buy a new one twice a month, back in the day!

Anyway, if you were hoping for a long, emotional courtroom drama, or even just a quick peek at the sentencing, sorry! Margo heard that it's all over, and that's enough closure for all of us. The Case of the Double-Crossing Office Assistant who Emotionally Used His Boss to Help His Crotchety Aunt but Then Suddenly Decided to Bomb his Boss's Apartment for Reasons Unknown and Then Also Suddenly Turned Himself In Immediately After Said Bombing Even Though There's No Way He Would've Gotten Caught is closed!

Now what's this about Aunt Cathy?

Something Has Happened

This is NOT the denouement I was anticipating. I doubt we'll ever see Evan again, or the delightful Aunt Cathy, who began the strip with such promise. The only thing we get is a single strip of the Professor being like "Fooled ya! Didn't burn to death in a fire!" and this tepid declaration of love. "Something has happened to me." "Oh, Greg! Say no more, I'm yours forever! Don't worry about Eric, he bit it years ago! Now kiss me, and let us never speak of Evan again."