Yawn

*Pokes head in*
*Sees conversation still going on*

Um, guys, I'm going to some kind of foreign country too.

Get It Over With!

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to Frozen Face Theater, where audience members are invited to speculate which emotions the actors are portraying without the benefit of visual cues.

I'm guessing Gabriella is probably upset that Martin has paid zero attention to her spiritual beliefs on the subject of marriage, but COME ON, the man has a point, this is dragggggging. And apparently, when I went back in the archives, they were originally going to get married at City Hall, so what the heck! Just do it and let's move on to resolve Margo's House of Mopes.

Guys:  Megan is in the UK right now, and I'm leaving for a trip to Japan tomorrow. (I put together a quick overview of our trip for my husband's blog if you interested in seeing what we'll be up to.) Casey will be here to hold down the fort, but I imagine she'll break after a few days. So this blog may be in temporary haitus. Hopefully by the time we get back, Gabriella and Martin will be married, Diane Devine will fly off on her broomstick, and Margo will find her bliss meditating at California’s Esalen Institute.

Just The Two of Us

Uh oh, guys! Looks like the next exit on the Highway of Love is Elopement City! Population, 2! City Limits: Gabby's and Martin's "House"!

Sadly, Margo will not be available to be your attendant/witness, she just doesn't do last-minute bookings. But I'm sure Lu Ann and that bald dude will be really great too!

A Famous Wedding Planner

Am I taking crazy pills?! No, she's not a famous wedding planner, she's a psychic medium who happened to worm her way into planning your wedding! And Martin should already know that because Gabriella kicked you out of the apartment on Diane's advice, and did you seriously never follow up on why that happened?! And you don't own a house and IT'S NOT HAUNTED!

Lost in Translation

Wait.... what? She does? *looks back at this past week's strips*
No like, seriously Gabby. How did we make the leap from "someone close to you wants to harm you but I can't tell you who" to "this house is evil"?

Is it like... she slept on it and realized that nothing can be closer to her than her house. She's IN her house! So clearly that's the problem! And the solution is for Martin to come to the house too?

Or maybe it's because English isn't her first language (I feel like that's true, but who remembers anymore). Diane is just taking advantage of a poor lady who doesn't know the difference between "evil intentions" and "evil house."

I am still voting "all of this is Margo's fever dream," though.

I Need a Friend

Ohhhh yeah, Martin! Your fiance. I seriously forgot the whole "psychic-friend disrupts engagement" angle of this story. Yeah, maybe you should let the man you're going to spend the rest of your life with in on your inner turmoil. Although, you know how he feels about psychics. (Hint: not good.) (Hint: this will end in tears.) (Hint: this storyline will end in September at the soonest.)

Something Feels Ominous

Dear diary,

Fell asleep in my clothes again. Woke up to find my hair back to its full raven luster again. (Clairol's "Easy to Use While You Snooze" Root Touch-Up does it again!)

Starting not to understand my own logic with the psychic stuff—if I do believe in spirits and mediums, wouldn't it follow that I should feel something ominous? Is it my mom, still lingering in the apartment? Is it my framed print of the Ninth Gate? Is it my two-in-one fire blanket and comforter?

Oh well. Have a long day of shutting out my loved ones ahead, better get started.

xoxo,

Gabbers

Your Mother and the Angels

Happy Mother's Day! I hope everyone is enjoying this story, in which a mother instantly suspects her own daughter of "evil intentions" because of something an obvious grifter told her. Basically the only way I can believe this strip at all anymore is if Diane Devine is hypnotizing Gabriella with Jafar's scepter just off panel.

Evil Intentions

Wednesday, May 6

Thursday, May 7

Maybe someone like, physically, uncomfortably close to you at this present moment. Someone who looks way too psyched to be telling you that someone close to you wishes you harm.

Omens and Portents

Things that the Ghost of Gabriella's Mother is afraid of:

1) The constant changing of Gabby's hair color is doing serious damage to her follicles, and she hopes she is using the right conditioner.
2) If Diane doesn't keep stalling that Gabby will be incredibly disappointed in how lame the ghostly warning is.
3) That her daughter could be gullible to believe a psychic who wears a turtleneck.
4) Diane's deformed hand.

Watching Over You

If my dead mother somehow willed her voice across the River Styx to the land of the living with a message to warn me, why didn't she, um, warn me about anything?

Warning Shot

 

"Diane, while you went into the other room, I heard my dead mother's voice!  I mean she sounded different, but the voice said it was my mother.  How is this possible?  Are you able to conjure the dead and change my hair color at will?  It can't possibly be that a charlatan is playing on my sterotypical ethnic, old world superstitions to bilk me out of the money I will get when I marry a rich guy?  IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!"

Medium

Thursday April 30, 2015

Friday May 1, 2015

Okay, help me out here guys. Is this suggesting that Diane just straight up strolled into the other room without the benefit of sleight of hand or misdirection or even just turning off the lights, and, I don't know, maybe put on a shawl and a fake voice—the voice of a mother she never could have possibly met—and that Gabby is BUYING it?? Is that what's happening, guys?

Martin, I know we derided you for not even entertaining the validity of Gabriella's beliefs, but Operation "You Don't Have to Take Her Beliefs Seriously, She's Just a Silly Woman" is in full swing here. Time to grab a fire ax and break down the door. Gabby is trapped by the flames of this swindler's hoodwinkery and she needs your help!