Saturday, December 25, 2010

Whoop-de-Doo and Dickery Dock

Well it looks like Santa has given the Professor the greatest gift of all: thicker and healthier-looking hair in just five minutes. His Just for Men hairstyle isn't just for the Sunday strips anymore! It's like a present for all of us.

Fascinating as this party is, we may be taking a few days off here and there in the next week. Happy holidays, everyone! Thanks for reading, and I'll see you again in the new year!

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Our First Guest

Um. Aunt Iris. Mr. Mallory doesn't appear to be your first guest. How do you explain all those ghostly blue figures in the background, hmm? Are those just the crack addicts and the meth heads you couldn't keep out the door?

I believe last year at about this time, we were just starting to suspect that Bobbie Merrill might have mental issues. Now I'm starting to suspect Aunt Iris might have issues as well. Might pep up the story a little. Throw a pistol and some hurt feelings in there and we've got a party!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Angels with Filthy Souls

Margo knows her neighbors allright. Snuffy. Al. Leo. Little Moe, with the gimpy leg. Cheeks. Boney Bob. Cliff. I could go on forever baby!

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

I'm Having a Party!

Whoa, what? I can't tell if Iris has already set up the apartment for a party or if she's only imagining this in her fevered brain. Is apartment 3-J really that much bigger than 3-G that they can fit a piano and a punch table in there? Crazy!

Monday, December 20, 2010

A Cat of a Different Color

Prissy the Wonder Cat has returned, and she's changed colors! She really is quite talented. But is she talented enough to escape Iris' clutches? I didn't think these roommates would have any problems until I took a closer look at the third panel:


Friday, December 17, 2010

Everywhere I Go, Architects!

You can see why Uncle Henry would be so proud of this building! It has some brick, and um a door, annnnd I'm fairly sure from the context it has an inside. Hmm. You might not be able to tell, but I work in communications at an architecture firm. Maybe that's why I've been avoiding this storyline; too close to work. I'm dating an architect, so they're really just all over the place. And now they're invading the funny pages. My one refuge!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Just Around the Riverbend

Wednesday December 15, 2010
Thursday December 16, 2010
Wow. No one does suspense like A3G, am I right? Who knew that in New York there would be a building right around the corner. But there it is, I'm guessing. I can't wait to not see this building. Maybe it's so great because it's got those low-energy LED Christmas lights all over it.

Monday, December 13, 2010


Panels from Sunday, December 12, 2010

Monday, December 13, 2010

It's official everyone: Lu Ann is over Alan! WHOOOOOOOO! I'd like to buy everyone a steak dinner, but that'd be unfair for our vegetarian readers, so instead I'll just say: Mission Accomplished.

While I enjoy the massive neuroses and feeble awkwardness that Margo and Tommie respoectively bring to their relationships, I think I enjoy Lu Ann's romances the best. Lu Ann is always so cheerful and optimistic about her budding relationships, and yet they're characterized by a dark undercurrent, because we all know that she's doomed to live with her roommates in Apartment 3-G for All Time. Margo and Tommie are usually capable of ruining their own relationships, but Lu Ann's end spectacularly, with guns or drugs or ghosts or whatever. So I'm excited!

How differently these two parallel kisses ended, huh? Sunday artist apparently missed the memo that Paul is steeped in self-doubt and insecurity, especially when his totally embarrassing dad is around. Jeez Dad, can't I humiliate myself without your supervision??

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Architectural Digest

Oh look, a new strip featuring the captivating Aunt Iris/Trey the Architect storyline. Looks like I lose the game of Hot Potato that Maggie, Casey and I are playing.

The look on Iris's face in the last panel says to me that she suspects Trey will try to make her sluggish and groggy with a heavy, decadent lunch and then take her to the abandoned lot where her beloved Uncle Henry's building once stood and choke her with a yellow ascot. It's like she JUST realized she's not supposed to go places with strangers. What a terrible vagabond! She should be relishing the spontaneity.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Pay No Attention to My Ascot

First of all, where in the blazes is this storyline going? Another long lost relative? Now I have to muster my interest for an ARCHITECHTURE subplot based on Aunt Iris and Harvey Dent? I'm sorry, I meant Trey, who by coincidence happens to shop at the same store as Two Face from Batman. Suits: Colored by with Ascots!

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Architects Are FASCINATING

Sorry for the skipped posts, I think all of us have been busy/disinterested in the fake-bike courier. I'm kind of confused as to why Iris assumed he was a courier in the first place, but don't feel like looking back at past strips to figure it out. Does she just assume anyone riding a bike is a courier? I do like how his fashion-forward scarf (?????) matches Iris's shirt. It's a match made in heaven. Except I get the feeling she's going to try to set him up with Tommie.

I'm digging the bizarre finger-waving response Iris has in the last panel. She's dreamily thinking of an architect she met while traipsing around the world, or something. His name was Ted Mosby.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Planes, Trains, and Taxi Cabs

Wow, this is so cool, the ghost of John Candy is giving Aunt Iris advice about boys! New York really is a magical place.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Stylish and Remorseful

Okay, coloring aside, this is the same shirt Aunt Iris always wears. And outside of the 70s, I don't think "burnt banana peel" has ever been a stylish color. In fact, according to this amazing chart, black is a popular color for both style AND penance. Just saying.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Sounds Fishy to Me

There's something so cute and sad about Tommie's look in the second panel. It seems to say, "Hey guys! I'm friends with you too, right? We're all friends? It feels good to be part of the gang!" Ohhh Tommie. When did your makeover start making you look so much like Christopher Robin?

Monday, November 29, 2010

As a Matter of Fact...

Paul, please! No one likes a desperate piano mover. E... Except Lu Ann.

On a positive note, I think this is the first time we've gotten such a good look at Lu Ann's baby blues! She looks very nice, a little Brenda Starr-esque.

Saturday, November 27, 2010


"Remember me, Lu Ann? Paul Linski? The guy with the aggressively blond hair? Hi. I just got this new thing called a 'cellular phone.' I'm not really sure how to operate it yet. I think you grip the top half and then yell into the bottom. What do you think, Lu Ann? Lu Ann? Are you there? I can't hear you! Say something, Lu Ann!"

Friday, November 26, 2010

Thank... Goodness

After ONE WHOLE GRUELING DAY of inconvenience, Margo can't wait to ditch that piano, and hopefully Tommie's icky dreams of stardom with it. You'd think, being the day after Thanksgiving, there'd Margo would make some cute joke about how it was hard to cook Thanksgiving dinner with the couch in the kitchen, or how she was giving thanks that the piano will be gone soon, but everyone knows Margo doesn't cook/gives thanks.

Guys, God is buzzing in again. Do you guys share a land line? Cute.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving, Prissy!

OK, so Prissy doesn't even appear in this strip, but I wanted to wish her a Happy Thanksgiving since she's our new favorite A3G character. I figured since I'm the west coast exile who's not caught up in family madness this holiday, I'd take blog duty today. You're welcome, Maggie and Megan. You should be thankful for me.

Now on to today's strip. Obviously, they're just setting up for generic blond-haired dude #451 to come back into the picture and sweep Lu Ann off her feet, for a little while, until he dies a tragic death or gets transferred to move pianos in Kenya, or something. But to me it just feels like Tommie is looking for things to worry about. Really, after all your problems resolve themselves, you're concerned that you might not find a piano mover? I mean, you do know that you can just Google "piano mover," right? Oh, wait, this is A3G. You do know that you can find a piano mover in the Yellow Pages, right? (Probably.) This is like the anti-Thanksgiving strip. Quit whining and be thankful that you don't have to deal with the piano, Aunt Iris, or Prissy. Geez.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! (Unless you're Canadian, then Happy Thanksgiving last month. And if you're from somewhere else, stop being so ungrateful.)

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

The Talented Ms. Prissy

Taser Lady, I grow more and more disenchanted with you each day that passes without you producing a taser. However, your cat is filling your place in my heart. In panel two, is Prissy...
  1. ...being held at arm's length by Aunt Iris?
  2. ...climbing up Taser Lady's chest?
  3. ...floating in midair?
  4. ...standing on her own super-stretcho legs?

I'm hoping for option 4. In any case, she appears to have doubled in size since yesterday. She really is something, isn't she?

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Prissy the Wonder Cat

Normally, an unusually affectionate cat would be depicted rubbing against someone's calves in a figure eight pattern. However, since this is the A3G Universe and it's illegal to show your legs at any time, Prissy has evolved into some kind of supercat that can and will leap onto Aunt Iris' shoulder like a parrot on a pirate. Just be thankful you're not wearing Prissy as a hat right now.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Riddle Me This, Iris!

Wow, love the oversized yellow question mark hanging over Aunt Iris' head in the second panel! The bobble alone is usually enough to convey surprise or confusion, but today it's just not enough. She's probably just wondering why they went to sleep in their clothes last night, because you know there's no question that some one named "Aunt Iris" will love cats.

Follow up questions for Aunt Iris will include:
  • How do you feel about moving the piano into my neighbor's apartment?
  • How do you feel about cats that play the piano?
  • How do you feel about carrying a taser?
  • At all times?
  • ....Did you start dying your hair to look more like me?
  • Not cool.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

The Piano Has Landed

Well! I'm eating my words immediately. That's not such a bad drawing of a grand piano. I have no idea how it fits in the room, or if they have a concert hall in their apartment, or what, but there is no longer denying the existence of the piano.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Are You There God? It's Me Margo

Gerard, we are never going to see this piano. Unless they start making pianos that look like desk lamps or blazers, we're just never going to see it. I don't see why Aunt Iris didn't get an upright, it'd be much more size efficient and waaay easier to draw.

How did the girls hook up their doorbell/callbox to sound through the ceiling? Unless that's God buzzing in. Is that why you're upset about the piano, Margo? You're afraid God has planted it in 3G like some kind of holy Trojan Horse? You're so precious.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Go Sleep on Your Piano, Jerk

First of all, I'm not sure why Tommie thinks Margo wants to know about her horrible day and how tired she is (does she ever?). Additionally, I'm not sure what kind of job search Tommie is even going on (does she go door to door asking if people need vocal assistance?) or why she thought it wouldn't be disastrously difficult.

But what I am sure of is that I really enjoy the smile on Margo's face in panel 3. If she's smiling, that has to mean she did something terrible to Tommie's piano, right? Wait, is that her index finger bending backward at an impossible angle? Agghhhh! Nevermind everything else I wrote. What's going on there? Did she injure herself while destroying the piano?

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Couch a l'Orange

That space near the refrigerator? Hope you guys don't have a galley kitchen! I can just see Margo in the kitchen with an oversized chef's hat on, sauteing large pieces of the couch in a big frying pan, and then shoving them in Tommie's face.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

There Will Be Blood

That's more like it! Margo looks exquisite in panel two, gritting her teeth, spitcurl coiling defiantly, immediately exasperated and cursing. I probably would be upset too if I had to squeeze a baby grand into a Manhattan apartment with two other roommates. I think her distressed look in panel three is meant to communicate: do I have the strength to throw the piano out the window and kill the guilty party in one night? Only if it's a full moon, Margo.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Long Day with the Lovebirds

Wasn't Lu Ann hanging out with the lovebirds all day too? Or else, what does she do all day? I guess since she owns the building, maybe she has to stay on call all day. Someone's got to! At least three floors, at least seven rooms a floor.

Anyway, does Margo really get that mad when a package arrives and it isn't for her? Or maybe it's because Lu Ann's getting ready to date another blond guy in a blazer. And we all know how that ends: drugs and murder! Chuckle chuckle chuckle!

Friday, November 12, 2010

Special Delivery

So orginally I thought, "Oh that wacky Aunt Iris just can't stop spending, she went out and got Tommie a piano so she can keep working on her showtunes or whatever." But nowwww I'm thinking that she just went out and got Tommie a male stripper, because no delivery person on earth wears a shirt and jacket on the job.

And Lu Ann, poor, naive Lu Ann, you're going to sign for this "package," aren't you? You think you're bobbling now, wait until he starts unloading and assembling!

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Salvation Goods

Looks like in addition to boater hats, this place sells wedding veils, Chinese calligraphy, and apothecary bottles. Maybe this place is some kind of Salvation Army/Home Goods hybrid. I just hope Aunt Iris isn't buying the wedding veil for Tommie, although she doesn't seem like the type. I'd go for the bottle!

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

What's on Sale?

Did I say Aunt Iris insists on hemorrhaging money? Because I meant she insists on HEMORRHAGING money. Jeez, Aunt Iris, get a grip, can't you not spend money for twenty minutes?? Then again, as long as you're just window shopping for boater hats, I guess you can't get into that much trouble. Prove me wrong!

Tuesday, November 9, 2010


I like LogopolisMike's prediction that this bike-on-car pile up is basically just a way to get fresh meat into the apartment. I also like that idea that Aunt Iris will inevitably worm her way into whatever budding relationship she is the catalyst for. Based on Bike Guy's speedy escape into oncoming traffic, I'd say she's not welcome. But once she starts paying his hospital bills, he won't have much of a choice.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Meanwhile, Uptown

Saturday November 6, 2010
Monday November 8, 2010
Holy mackeral, does anyone know what's going on here?? Let's try to take this step by step.
  1. Aunt Iris concentrates on the world's smallest map of New York City. Mark Trail lies in wait on his pink bike.
  2. Bike guy runs his pink bike into a random matching pink car in such a way that the front half of the bike disappears entirely. Motion lines abound.
  3. Bike guy is gushing invisible blood. Aunt Iris assumes it's all her fault, therefore exonerating the car that actually hit the guy. Car drives away quietly. License plate number is never jotted down. Civil lawsuit opportunity is lost.
  4. Aunt Iris insists on hemorrhaging money while visiting the city, but Bike Guy is having none of it.

Where on earth is this storyline going?

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Her Name's Not Taser Lady?

I am pretty psyched that Margo (who begins this strip looking like she's straining her face trying to smile) mentioned the taser incident!!! That's awesome! I also thought when she said "I have a no-cats rule," she was going to play the "we own this building and don't allow pets" card, but alas, that seems to be a separate thought. Do you own the building or not??? Whatever, at least we get to see Margo throwing her weight around. "You owe taser lady, but I hate animals, so forget that."

And I am really genuinely curious about where this guy getting hit by car storyline is going. I know this means it's going to be really, really lame.

Friday, November 5, 2010


How can Tommie even muster up that bobble or surprise? Whenever someone mentions an upcoming vacation and a beloved pet in the same conversation, you know how it's going to end.

Now is the time to negotiate. How many dollars a day are we talking here? Do you get unlimited use of the taser? Is it okay if you eat all of her Doritos? etc. etc.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Breaking the Rules

You're lucky, Taser Lady. Old Tommie would've turned you in to the landlord in a heartbeat. But new Tommie knows that rules are for squares! New Tommie will also shirk her responsibility to your cat and foist it on her fishy Aunt Iris, so you know, watch out. We should start taking bets on how dead/missing this cat is going to be in three weeks.

UPDATE: I just learned from the Comics Curmudgeon that the Lovely Ladies of Apartment 3-G own the building? Wow, that really NEVER comes up. Maybe that's why Tommie can afford to knock off the nursing and pursue her dreams of a singing career. If she plays her cards right, Prissygate could be lucrative in and of itself...

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

The Many Faces of Taser Lady

OH MY GOSH, Taser Lady is back!! SHE'S BACK, EVERYONE!! I knew she'd come back for us if we just believed hard enough, and now she's here!! She's really here! Although it sounds like she's just about to leave us again... aw. At least she'll leave Tommie (read: Iris, obviously) in charge of Prissy, which I can only assume is her pet name for her taser.

But what's a Taser Lady without a taser? It's obviously quite upsetting for TL. So upsetting that her face keeps mutating. We've all been there before, haven't we?

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

The Ol' Dusty Trail

Well Tommie, even though you're my own flesh and blood, you still haven't invited me to stay here, so I guess I'll check out the hostel situation in New York. I blew all my money on deli food, there's no way I'm shelling for a real hotel. No no, really, that's okay, you don't have to put me up, I understand... but could you please wait until I'm gone to look so relieved?

Monday, November 1, 2010

Gone Fishin'

Nice, Iris. Reeeeeeeeal subtle. "Oh, I just had this really weird dream where all the bright lights in the big city said, Hello Aunt Iris! Welcome to our fair city! Why don't you kick off your shoes and stay a while, stay in a nice comfy apartment with sweetest, prettiest niece in the world, stay stay stay oh please oh please Tommie LET ME STAY!!"

Unfortunately, Tommie is more obtuse (or much more clever) than I suspected, so you're to have to lay it on even thicker if you want an invitation to stay at 3G.

Sunday, October 31, 2010

Families > Adventures > Failures

Panels from Sunday's strip. If you read the middle strip as "homes and families," it makes sense that Iris might have a few regrets. However, if you read it as "homes and failures," as I did when I read it, then Iris' alternate lifestyle doesn't seem so bad!

Friday, October 29, 2010

Please, Iris, I Want Some More

APARTMENT 3-G YOU ARE DRIVING ME CRAZY. You promise me deli food, so I'm thinking pastrami on rye (seedless, please!), maybe with some pickle spears, maybe a little potato salad, top it off with a fountain soda, maybe even an egg cream!... and then you show me an empty plate. I can't stand it.

Meanwhile, Aunt Iris is worldy? I think we've all assumed that Ohio + Gary Larson style glasses = bumpkin, but apparently she's a vagabond. The world's dowdiest vagabond. You'd think she'd have better luggage by now!

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Tommie Thompson Stars in: The Play

Oh, the play? Is that still happening? I really did assume her part in it was just an belabored set up to get Tommie on I Dressed in the Dark. An elaborate hoax, if you will! Um, I haven't noticed her going off to practice anymore, or to the theater at all. I think the play opened, right? And she's going off trying to find work before finishing her other gig? Burning bridges, Tommie. That's all I'm saying.

Meanwhile, middle panel: I think I found a new profile picture! There's something delightfully wacky about her upturned, faraway stare.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Tell You What?

Tell you what, Aunt Iris? Tell you that it's dangerous to walk in the middle of the street? Ohio is more rural than I thought... now come back to the sidewalk. And watch out for the yellow ones, they don't stop.

Monday, October 25, 2010

Pish Tosh?

"You mean like cheap luggage? ZINNNNNNNNNNNNG" what Tommie should say, but probably won't. I don't know if tomorrow's strip is going to be about Aunt Iris being shocked by New York City prices or about delicious pastrami sandwiches, but I should be happy either way.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Pie Today!

Since Maggie and Megan are both out now in a corn maze or riding goats or joining an Amish community or something (I don't really know, they're 3000 miles away and I barely pay attention to anything that say.... just kidding!), I suppose I should make today's post. Which is a shame, because after reading today's strip, I feel really stupid. I don't get it. I mean, the only thing I got about today's strip is that Iris, Margo, and Lu Ann are horrible gluttons. Iris brought this pie specifically for Tommie, and they proceed to eat almost the entire pie in what I can only imagine is a matter of a couple hours?

But, regardless, I don't understand the punchline, at all. Does she mean "jamming pie down your gullet today"? I don't know. I'm honestly questioning my sanity, because of how little sense this makes to me. Then again, it seems like Lu Ann and Margo are on the same page, so maybe I'm OK. Insights, anyone?

Oh, a quick Google search tells me it has something to do with Through the Looking Glass, and I guess instant gratification or something, whatever, I'm going to pretend it's a complete non sequitur because it's actually funnier that way.

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Who IS That?

Oh... Tommie. That piece of pie isn't your Aunt Iris. She's the one holding the pie. Come on, you know better. It's terrible that young women these days think they have to act dumb to be popular and stylish. Or at least just popular. What happened to all the v-neck shirts?

Friday, October 22, 2010

Who Wants a Piece?

Oh man. I bet the shouting matching that will inevitably occur between sweet old Aunt Iris and Margo will be as delicious as that buckeye pecan pie. Who wants a piece indeed! I don't believe in delayed gratification either, so you two might as well get started. Let's see some fist shaking and expletives, pronto!