Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Kat and Mouse Games

Every time that more information is revealed about Kat, I wonder if she's a dominatrix or a makeover show host. She's setting up these elaborate games and punishments, it's like she's a Bond villain. Oh Margo, you ungrateful witch with a b. I mean here Tabitha took the time to explain hair extensions to you and promised to make you GORGEOUS while you do nothing but sit still and be quiet, and all you have to say is whatever. When will Kat punish you for your insolence and defiance? And Tabitha, you don't have to wear a white cape, those are just for the clients. Unless Kat mandated that attire and threatened your friends and family if you don't comply...

Monday, August 30, 2010

Kat's Revenge: Tracts?

Oh my god Margo, how can you not know what hair extensions are?? Have you not seen one makeover edition of America's Next Top Model? Because I just can't believe anyone can not know what extensions are at this point. How do you think celebrities grow their hair so fast??

Anyway, if this is Kat's way of punishing Lu Ann for not getting her hair cut, it's actually pretty cunning. Now Margo's bun will be larger than ever. And as her bun grows, so does her power.


Ohhh hohoho. Hey kids: never try to redesign your blog at work. Apparently, Surf Control blocks certain images on Internet Explorer, so I had no idea there was anything but a white background for the template I chose on Friday. Serves me right for blogging on the job. Hope this new design looks a little less offensively garrish.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Lu Ann's Proudest Moment

Lu Ann! I'm so proud of you! You figured it out.... now just keep concentrating like that. Hold on to that thought. Don't get distracted by something shiny.

Really, Lu Ann needs to be more afraid of Margo than anyone else right now. If they start trying to manipulate Lu Ann by taking out her insolence on Margo, Margo's fury will know no bounds. She'll do much more than cut that precious blond hair.

Friday, August 27, 2010


I think that Kitty's main concern at this point is that her forehead is growing larger by the panel. Next time she appears, she's going to look like that kid from Mask. Also, Lu Ann, you're pretty stupid, so you don't realize that Kat and Kitty are playing what is known in the biz as the "Good Cop, Bad Cop" routine. Kitty is just trying to pretend that she's empathetic to the rape of your locks, but she's really pushing Kat's agenda. "If you don't end up with a bob at minimum, I will force Tommie to wear jort overalls and Margo will go home with nothing but mumus." Kat doesn't mess around.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Good Cop, Bad Cop

Did Kat physically beat up Lu Ann? Because those would be panels worth seeing. I suspect Lu Ann's referring to mental/emotional abuse though, which is like, jeez, toughen up Lu Ann, she's said worse. She's so frail and desperate for support on the hair thing ("Why doesn't anyone get how important this is??") that I think she's about to kiss Kitty. Go for it, you two crazy lovebirds!

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Think About It!

I like how Kat has thrown away all of their clothes, but isn't letting them wear any of their new clothes yet, so Lu Ann is forced to wear Tommie's sweatshirt. The things that sweatshirt has seen... the things...

Anyway. Megan, hate to contradict, but I think we should just admit to ourselves that this big fuss is going to be all for not. Just when Lu Ann will agree to a haircut, Mr. Mojo will decide just to trim off the split ends and be done with it. Cutting off Lu Ann's hair would be like cutting off a golden retriever's ears, or cutting off a dolphin's dorsal fin. Both of which are cruel but kind of funny to picture?

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Kat Fight

I can't believe that Lu Ann thought the frail and decrepit Mr. Mojo would be a bully. He's probably off to get a B12 shot so he has the strength to lift his arms and cut your hair. Kat will not accept this kind of rebellion, not when she is so overdue for an Emmy. My prediction is this whole "my blonde hair is my entire identity" story line drags on for about another two weeks and Lu Ann ends up with a brunette pixie cut and immediately tries to jump off a bridge.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Mister Mojo

Hi, this is Maggie! I'm back, not because I'm less busy, but because my friends have lifted my spirits and caught me up and OH MY GOD, I HAVE TO TALK ABOUT TODAY'S STRIP BEFORE THEY DO. It's weird and delightful, just like Mister Mojo himself. I'm guessing he's supposed to look stylish and edgy, but really he looks like a freakishly old child from the Make-A-Wish Foundation. Or maybe Mr. Bolle's impression of gay men is stuck in 1980s stereotypes, where if you had AIDS, you were gay, and if you were gay, you probably had the AIDS. I saw And the Band Played On, I know what I'm talking about with 80s stereotypes!


What's this? Another guest blogger? Don't fret faithful readers, Maggie is taking a summer hiatus of some kind and will return with a brand new season this fall. Unless these two newcomers steal the show and the audience demands that the role of Maggie be recast.

As Casey recently posted some of the new stuff, I thought that I would hop in the way back machine to those strips that Maggie so willfully neglected.

Here are the rules that Mama Kat gives the ladies before their big spending spree:

Personally, I would have also mentioned that with Tommie's complexion, copper is probably not the best color choice...

But Kat if she turns away from her power pantsuits, then her angry finger pointing won't have nearly the same terrorizing effect on her victims. How will anyone take her seriously? Also, did you even read the bio information on these contestants? You might want to stay away from mourning references when someone just lost their boyfriend to a freak avalanche in Nepal. That was in there right before the psychotic step-mother episode. Pay attention!

Every time I look at Lu Ann's face in the second panel, it makes me laugh. It reminds me of the look that my dog gets on his face when the vet takes his temperature. And her blouse is fairly frill-less and seems to be more of a jewel tone than a pastel. Is Kat even paying attention at this point? Or is she, like myself, too disturbed by the presence of the purple man to focus on the world around her?

I think we can safely assert that Kat is a figurehead who relies on minions like Kitty and Nancy to do all the real work while she reaps in the rewards from the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences. In other news, the purple man has infected someone else. He's going after the entire crew! In the second panel, I can only imagine that Kat has either just done that horrifying, dramatic self-thumb point gesture, which I think I've only ever seen employed in musical theatre, or that she secretly sucks her thumb. Don't do it Kat! You just get an overbite and then your parents buy you a spray that makes your thumb taste bad to break you of the habit. Or at least that's what I've been told...

SPOILER ALERT! A preview of the big reveal:

To be fair, Kat never said that the dresses were supposed to be attractive, just that Tommie was supposed to wear dresses. Does Tommie not know that she has red hair because I'm pretty sure that magenta is not a good color for carrot-tops. Apparently, in addition to the ugly dress, the new Tommie is going to stare vapidly into space.

The bun isn't permanent! At night, it escapes the confines of the elastic band and breathes free! At night it can do whatever it wants! Braids, french braids, the Farrah flip! That's really the only reason that I included this strip, because I have grown tired of Lu Ann's whining about her stupid blonde hair. Although at the pace of this strip, if they do cut her hair, it would probably be sometime in the next decade before it grew all back. I hope they give Lu Ann a pixie cut, just to break her down. Margo seems to echo my sentiments about Lu Ann's problems in the last panel...

Saturday, August 21, 2010

I, Robot

Blank canvas is the perfect way to describe Lu Ann. Especially given that in the second panel, it looks like someone has removed her batteries. And by the way, who allowed a guy named Mister Mojo to become a stylist? I mean, he really looks more like a Buddhist monk than anything. Hey, maybe he WILL shave Lu Ann's hair. And she won't protest, she'll just stare blankly into the distance. Perfect.

Friday, August 20, 2010


Aye, mateys. I be commandeering this blog.

To be real for a second, Maggie is a punk. A PUNK. Who hasn't been blogging because she's "busy." Yeah, we all have problems, Maggie.

I would play catch up with this blog, but frankly I'm lazy and I've been drinking some wine, and that would be asking a bit much.

Lu Ann is being a little naive here, to be honest. Margo, going soft? Puh-leez. Can you not tell from the death stare she's giving that glass of what I can only assume is mini-bar vodka that she is not going down without a fight? This is MARGO, people. If they try to cut her hair, I'm pretty sure someone is going to get cut. If they try to dye it, someone's gonna die. Get it??? Fun with homophones.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Get Smart

Sound advice from Margo, as one big kat sizing up another, and so begins the reconciling of the roommates. Margo, deep down, feels some sympathy for Lu Ann, who doesn't know the first thing about playing it smart. Either that, or Margo's just feeding her ego. Ehhhhh.. probably that. Anyway, I really do hope this gabfest turns into a carefully planned coup d'etat, involving Kitty and/or Taser Lady. Tommie wouldn't get her makeover, but god Tommie, think of Lu Ann's hair for once!

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Changes for Lu Ann

And that would please Margo. That would please Margo very much.