Monday, March 30, 2015

Booked Solid

Which would be the better reading?

A. "Okay, Margo," Carla whispered softly. "You don't have to demean me." Her hand gently caressed Margo's shirt collar, absently straightening out a wrinkled lapel, as she had so many times before. Margo smiled inwardly; there would be time enough to demean Carla later.

B. "Okay, Margo," Carla whispered coldly. "You don't have to demean me." She had moved unnervingly close; close enough for Margo to see the anger flash in her eyes. Carla's hand hovered just above her shoulder. Suddenly she felt a strange tightening in her throat. The realization hit her like a ton of squiggle art: Carla was the Sith Lord.

Sunday, March 29, 2015

International Man of Mystery

Wait...didn't we already find out that one Greg Cooper was James Bond?  Like a year ago?  That's why he went to London and gave Margo an emerald pre-engagement ring.  Is Lu Ann Skyler playing coy because she doesn't want to watch Margo to kill her in a fit of rage stroke when she brings up Greg's name?  Or is this obvliviousness part of her method acting?

Friday, March 27, 2015

Not Even a Hint

Look at Margo's pure dismay. "Could it be possible that you really know this little about the movie you were cast for? Did you even talk to the actual casting director? Do you know for sure that it wasn't your mom on the other line?"

Typically, there is a hint of who's going to play James Bond: the guy who played him in the previous film. He usually has a pretty good shot at the role, Skyler. But I guess I could see Greg Cooper going Lazenby... rejecting the role after one film, growing a beard and long hair... or in this case, growing an amorphous hat and overcoat.

Thursday, March 26, 2015

Stalking Margo

Margo assumes this because, as the villain, she is the star of 3G.

Also, seriously, Skyler? You're a successful actress in a James Bond movie who takes a completely unknown role and stalks her own publicist? Are you sure you haven't been cast in James Dong: Triple X 7?

Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Latest Conquest

Wait a second Margo, I'm confused: do you mean my military campaign against the Huns or—OH, no, you probably mean the movie!

I hope we do get a couple of days of description of the plot, because I would love to hear Margaret Shulock's interpretation of a Bond movie. "It's called Dr. Live and Let Gold Dying Twice Diamonds is Not Enough. James Bond is back, and this time, it's personal! I'll play the part of Lulu Kachuchu, a lady romantically spurned by Bond, which is enough of a reason for her to try to blow up London, because, men! What can we do without them? Eh? Margo?"

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Sounds Lonely

Just wanted to confirm: when I was a single lady, I loved being talked to like this. That said, I didn't feel the need to pronounce "I'm my own person!" It's... kind of self-evident?

Monday, March 23, 2015

Given Up on Men

It's kind of hilarious to me that any of the A3G girls would even pretend to give up on men, even temporarily, when every single plot revolves around some kind of romance. Margo may be the exception with the current "wedding planning from hell" scenario, but she's taking breaks all the time to bump into Columbo on the street corner and whimper about how lonely she is. If only she had a man! Meanwhile, since Tommie got over her fake fiance grief, she's been essentially whisked away off panel, and Lu Ann, duh, does she even have a job anymore? Curating? Art classes? Homemade jam start-up? I predict T-minus two weeks before she's smooching Mr. Six. By which I mean July 2015.

Friday, March 20, 2015

Happier Terms

Thursday March 19, 2015
 Look who it is look who it is!

Friday March 20, 2015
He has a name now! I guess he's going to be a regular character? I still find it highly unlikely that Lu Ann would go for a bald guy, but if an A3G lady talks to the same guy more than once, she's kind of obligated to date him. Even if he is a smug creature.

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

A Lot Going On

Welp. Lu Ann's jacket is back on. Martin, if you thought you were seducing Lu Ann with your sweet nothings about struggling to suppress your rage, I guess you blew it by meeting any concerns about your daughter with a big "Meh." Time to break open the jam?

P.S. It's pretty ridiculous that Margo and Martin and everyone else is like "oh Margo has a lot on her plate right now" when she has one, maybe two things on her plate if you actually count her job.

Tuesday, March 17, 2015


Good to see that all of the accent pieces (and Lu Ann's hair) at The Towers are bedecked in kelly green for St. Patrick's Day.

Do you mean it's not easy to muddle through wedding planning/Gabby being silly and superstitious/Margo having a complete crisis of confidence?  I feel you brother.  It's really hard to come up with funny blog post about it twice a week. 

Monday, March 16, 2015

Homemade Jam

Well if you thought it was interesting to see where the Return of Skylar Roan was going, YOU WERE WRONG, it's way cooler to talk about (deeply out-of-season) strawberry jam! Mmm, mm! Lu Ann/Skyler/Carol Collins made it out of strawberries she found at a local farmer's market two months in the future! Strapping raven-haired men like Martin/Sam/Greg Cooper/Trey Brooks love it!

Seriously though, what? If my roommate went over to my dad's hotel room to give him a homemade present, while I'm clearly in a bad mood, AND she wore her sexiest turtleneck? I'd be livid. I have to assume she's only there to run into Mr. Six Flags button-pusher again.

Saturday, March 14, 2015

No Problem

Wow, the intervening months have not been kind to Skyler.  She's graduated from the crew neck tee of the bloom of her youth to the blouse of her womanhood.  The industry is very hard on women.

Where in the world is this storyline going?  Gabby and Martin getting married, Margo verbally berating everyone around her and the return of an incidental character?

Friday, March 13, 2015

At the All-Night Diner

 Thursday March 12, 2015

Friday March 13, 2015
I have nothing to say about this fugue state we appeared to have entered on Thursday. I'll just say, Skyler, OUCH. I thought she was going to be that random waitress Thelma, but no, just your average blockbuster Hollywood actress, dressed to the top button. She is looking a little worse for the wear. Hollywood/Great Britain ages a person I guess. Not a lot of recurring roles for Bond girls, maybe she's coming back as M?

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Quivering Little Worm

Tuesday March 10, 2015

Wednesday March 11, 2015
This is glorious, I tell you. Glorious.

Things Margo is telling a grown-ass man:

  • you make me sick to my stomach
  • you're a quivering little worm
  • I could crush you with my shoe
  • get lost

100% great. Anyone who claims to be Margo's friend should know to prepare for days like this... days when Margo's magnificent rage and despair lock on to you like a heat-seeking missile and turn you to ash. And yet, isn't this why you love her? Don't you deal with weeks, months, years of indifference, ignored calls, expensive meals, unreturned favors, her kooky WASP-y ethnic mother with her silly fortune-teller friend—don't you do all this so you can occasionally bask in the white-hot laser beam of her disparagement?

Look at Sam's face in the second panel on Tuesday. Mingled with fear is the anticipation of pleasure. He's like, "Awww yeah, here it comes, the pay back!" Kudos to Frank Bolle for pulling out a pretty nuanced facial expression.

Monday, March 9, 2015

Lost in Her Troubles

Sorry for the lack of posts recently. The three of us were meditating on the Zen koan: if Margo has an emotional meltdown and there's no one around to hear it, does her head still bobble? (Spoilers: of course it does.)

Umm. Margo. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think the "deal" you struck with Sam is that he would stay out of the wedding planning biz until you sorted out the Diane Devine situation. But isn't Sam your assistant? You shouldn't need a chance meeting to sort this out/berate him.

Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Margo Breaks Down

Ooh. You know you're in a bad mood when you sour the kelly green curtains.

According to our labeling system, in the almost-six-year (yike) history of this strip, Margo has cried in four panels total prior to today's meltdown, including one bout of tears that instantly turned to suspicion, and one spell of crocodile tears. For comparison, Lu Ann has eight panels of tears. Seven for Tommie. Apparently she only cried once about the whole "fake fiancee dying in a plane crash" thing? But she spent aaaaaaaaages in a tearless animal ranching funk.

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Too Far

What is happening to Margo?  Maybe she's had some sort of off-panel traumatic brain injury that's causing her to become emotionally unstable.  Or Frank Bolle and Margaret Shulock are using Margo's growing isolation and anger as a coded plea to let them stop this strip.

Ordinarily, I enjoy when she's icy and tough, but now she's just being a witch with a b.  Watch out Tommie...I hope you're working triples at the hospital again.

Monday, March 2, 2015

Perfectly Fine

Oh no.  Margo's second layer of jacket is off, and it was only that thin layer of polyester that was restraining her contempt and the swirl of emotions that have been bubbling her since she began wandering the yellow brick street.  Off to the nickelodeon with you insipid blonde roommate!

Sunday, March 1, 2015

Sunday Recap

Friday, February 27th

Sorry for the belated blogging lately.  Maggie is on a well deserved vacation, but that coincided with the release of the third season of House of Cards.  The exploits of Frank Underwood were just a tad more interesting than Margo having a crisis of confidence in the the middle of the street.

I find it hard to believe that the event in Margo's life that throws her into an existensial crisis is not her fiancee dying in a Nepalese avalanche or her former assistant trying to glitter bomb her apartment building.  It's her mom kind of being a bridezilla.

Saturday, February 28th

You mean the not being hungry is weird?  I would think that it is pretty normal that Margo mistreats her slaves roommates and demands that they leave her alone.