Growing Up

I.... I'm not sure I understand what Doris' point is here. I guess having no background information, she's assuming Marty is just going through a teen angst phase that she'll grow out of... which I guess is fair enough. But maybe she should ask what's wrong before offering empty platitudes? Yes, Doris, teenagers do grow up, bearing the scars of abandonment and caring for their PTSD-stricken fathers. It'll all be terrific!

Speaking of growing up (but on a much brighter note), I'd like to take a moment to make an important announcement about our little Maggie, who is all grown up - and getting married on Saturday!! Congrats Mags! We love you! Excuse me, I'm a little verklempt. Talk amongst yourselves. I'll give you a subject: Do you think Maggie will wear awesome bows like Doris' in her hair on Saturday? Discuss.

There, I feel better.

For you readers out there, that means Maggie will be on hiatus for her fab honeymoon (she'll be doing tomorrow's post and then peacing out for a couple of weeks), so Megan and I will be trying to live up to her standards while she's gone (don't worry Maggie, I guarantee nothing important will happen in A3G world in the next couple of weeks). Bear with us as posting times, etc. may be a little funky (especially this weekend when we are celebrating Maggie!)

Everything Okay?

Oh, Marty, hello! Yes, I was just wondering what happened to your father after he tore himself from your grip, threw you to one side, and dashed off howling into the night. Did he get lost in Chelsea, or was he able to get a subway back to wherever you live? I hope his headache is all better.

On the plus side, we're witnessing Doris' transformation into Ruby. Sooo. That's fun?

Thanks, Doris

There is nothing cool or interesting to say about today's strip. The only kind of funny thing is that I originally thought Lu Ann said "Thanks, dudes." in the first panel, which wouldn't make any sense but would be fun. Imagine what a different strip this would be if Lu Ann said things like "Thanks, dudes." Maybe she'd be a California surfer chick who moved to the big city, or a stoner burn-out who never grew up after high school, or a grown-up Michelle Tanner. All of which are kind of the same thing in my head, when I think about it.

Desperation

Now I know Doris doesn't own one of those newfangled television sets (for heaven's sake, she doesn't even go to see those talkies everyone's always going on about), but you'd think she would have at least seen a photo in the newspaper of her own state's Governor... I guess when all men look essentially alike though, it's hard to keep track.

Meanwhile, Peter, what happened to the 3-day rule? Even Lu Ann is saying (not in so many words) "Wow, this is a pretty desperate move."

Side note: What happened to Doris??? She aged rapidly. Maybe she's just losing her eyesight and I should go easy on her.

Another Favor

Whoa whoa whoa, have Jack and Doris defected, or are they just part-timing at the Davis Print Studio? Because if they thought they could escape Margo, they should know there will always be another "favor," and that the price of disobedience is a fish wrapped in newspaper crammed in your PO Box. And take it from someone who knows---it's impossble to get the fish stink out of there.

The Dark Horse Blogger

Hello loyal blog followers! So Maggie and Casey have dropped the ball here the past few days, so I thought I would swoop on in do a little updating so you guys don't fall behind in these AMAZING storylines!

Friday, May 14th

Margo, he's not crying, it's just the fumes from his yellow onion suit making his eyes water. Or those decorative yellow onions behind you.

Oh boy, here it comes, the end of Paul. He's stayed too long, he's gotten attached. It's the death knell for male supporting characters in a strip that has featured three women living together for the past 40 years. At least he can take solace in the fact that odds are he won't die in a Himalayan avalanche. I wonder, dear readers, how he will meet his end? A freak piano moving accident? Construction accident at his remote shack?

Monday, May 16th

Wow, that was a quick wedding. I guess the illustrator had a hand cramp or something and didn't feel like going to all that trouble for these secondary characters. Doris looks like she's just been crowned Queen of the Frumpy Librarians. I wonder what the one important thing is? Is it to recommend a good "De-Purpling" clinic for the guests? Maybe everyone but Jack and Doris went through that lilac door and were irrevocably changed.

Tuesday, May 17th

What the what? Alright, let's start at the beginning. Mmm, that dress just gets better and better with each new angle. Doris, after the wedding, I would recommend that you see a doctor to remove that growth from your shoulder, as well as put it back in its socket. Now, I don't know know what kind of "modern" reception these crazy kids are having, but generally the men aren't invited to participate in the bouquet toss. A plausible explanation is Paul was just near the dance floor, and Doris lost control of the toss when her arm fell out of its socket. You would think he would have let it go past him so that one of the desperate, single, lilac women could catch it. Or just let LuAnn catch it. The only logical conclusion is that Doris threw the bouquet so hard that she dislocated her own shoulder. It was wild throw, and Paul instinctively reached up and plucked those white roses out of thin air. Either way, it's further evidence that Paul is going to join Eric Mills at the big gallery in the sky.

Jack Throws a Curveball

Friday, September 30th

I have no idea whether it is Lu Ann or Margo making that statement in the last panel. It looks to me like it's Lu Ann's hair, but Margo has an exceptionally evil look on her face, one that says "Oh Doris, now that we've gotten this makeover, we're sooo much more stylish than you, with your unfortunate bob, outdated glasses, and general library marm aesthetic. Of course we'll let you borrow our new, better clothes, but you will never look as hot as us!" It is a naive selfishness that does sound like Lu Ann, but as a brunette, she's going to have to beef up her intellectual powers.

Saturday, October 1st

Jack, I know that you think Lu Ann is a dumb blonde, but it's a little bit redundant to introduce someone has your fiancee and soon-to-be wife, as they pretty much mean the same thing. This news has sent Lu Ann and Margo into a bobble-headed tizzy. What? Her? You mean Doris McNoFace? Did you ask Doris' cats for permission to ask for her hand? I know that Mr. Whiskers had reservations about your flirtatious relationship with Lu Ann. Miss Marple just doesn't want to get hurt again, like last time...

What Up With That

Tuesday September 28, 2010

Wednesday September 29, 2010

Lu Ann is right. What is UP with Jack?? Panel three on Tuesday is one of my favorites in a long time. "Oh, just talking. Chit chat. AND IT'S KILLING ME INSIDE."

And then he goes from shocking dispair right back to, "Oh Doris, you rougish waif!" All while somehow transporting Margo and Lu Ann onto the other side of the room. What's UP with that?

Sweet Sweet Doris

Dorrrrrisssssss...! Why you gotta be stirring up shit that Lu Ann clearly doesn't remember? She could've had a precious few more seconds of thinking she was tight with Margo (according to the thought process Margo = liked old hair = friend!) instead of being racked once again with the suspicion that, yes, just days after "teaming up" with you Margo's talking shit about you again and yes, it's probably centered around a catty remark about your precious hair that will hurt you deeply. Because that how Margo does.

Poor Lu Ann

Please let it be about how stupid Lu Ann looks with her new hair. She'll never be curator now!

Incidentally, it seems Lu Ann is the new Tommie. And it's really getting annoying. First of all, as a brunette I'm a little offended by her attitude toward brown hair - even if her hair is only borderline brunette. Secondly, as a rational human being I'm offended by her inability to SHUT UP FOR ONE MINUTE ABOUT HER DAMNED HAIR.

YOUR FACE IS!!

Jack proves once again what a smooth talker he is by bellowing "YOU ARE" at Doris. And then, OH SNAP, Doris surrenders her cupcake! Look at her, waving her cupcake right in Jack's face!

If only Margo was there to say it herself. Oh well, at least Doris didn't offer him Betty White's giant dusty muffin.

It's not too late to vote for your favorite storyline of last year. Bobbie is firmly in the lead, but Catfight isn't far behind, and Taser Lady is only a zap behind. I'm impartial of course; I love all of my children equally. But vote early and often, I always say!

Brown Baggin' It

Hello all! Hope you all had a relaxing weekend. Despite all precautions, I managed to get a pretty malicious sunburn on my back. Summer has begun! So what did I miss?

SACK LUNCHES!!! Whooooooo! I can't believe I almost didn't get home in time to post about this. Nora is hiding from Margo and Lu Ann, but reveals that she loves her job, which is... spending every waking hour at Margo's beck and call? I guess she doesn't like Lu Ann interfering. It's weird though, I feel like most people are kind of shy about sharing their deeply masochistic tendencies with virtual strangers. But that's what makes New York great, right? The personalities!

Helter Skelter

Yesterday's comments about the Scorpio Killer (who, by the way, looks nothing like Jack) have nevertheless got me spooked that Jack is, yes, a serial killer. "I hope you'll stay and help me, Lu Ann, even when everyone else has left. Won't you stay and be my curator? What if Margo was.... no longer a problem. Then would you stay?" Ahh! Lu Ann, get out of there!

Also, I think Jack is supposed to be an older man. Back in February, he looked more like Martin's age, but recently he's appeared much younger. Maybe he gets fresher and more youthful with each victim he slays...

The Back Gallery

Rowr! As Doris remarked yesterday, Jack sure is good at talking! "Me too." ...classic! Although Lu Ann had to talk about the gallery's art, possibly her own, in the most stilted, obvious way to set him up. She might even be looking in mirror in that second panel. Mirror mirror on the wall, who's the most beautiful thing of them all?

Spring Styles

I just realized Lu Ann's wearing a pea coat buttoned all the way to the top. What is it, May 26th? Memorial Day just around the corner? Temperature expected to reach 94 degrees in New York today? Lu Ann, you look INSANE! Doris looks only marginally less crazy in some kind of long-sleeved polo shirt... she's cooking up some kind of a Tiger Woods meets Prince Valiant vibe. I really do hope IDITD is coming for all of them. Makeovers for everybody!

Speaking of a change in style, I'm thinking of updating the look of the site. Woman's prerogative! I was going to use one of my favorite panels from the past year to inspire my design, but I'm having trouble choosing. I might need your help on this, stay tuned.

Personal Personnel Problems

Stealing Margo's boyfriends? Margo sure can hold a grudge (surprise). She must be talking about some storyline so distant I don't even remember it. I mean, Margo was complaining about Lu Ann's history of boyfriend theft back in November 2006, when she was upset that Lu Ann was trying to steal Eric from her (she wasn't). Also funny from the archives, Margo takes another swipe at Lu Ann's art! How are these two people friends at all?? At any time??

So! Does anyone have any what Margo is referring to here? Did they go to high school together and Lu Ann starting necking with Margo's main squeeze, perhaps?

Lu Ann... Powers?

Uhhhhh, yeah. I hate to oppose the Margo, but is she really trying to accuse Lu Ann of being wily? Lu Ann? Being underhanded and deceitful and clever to further her own career? I'm not sure Lu Ann can handle having open motives, nevermind ulterior motives. The extent of Lu Ann's cunning is her ability to make herself a a bowl of cereal in the morning. Okay, that's a little harsh, I bet she can handle the toaster in a pinch.

Talk it Out

Yeah Margo. What's really wrong? Was the jade not heated to your liking during the hot stone massage? Was the pomegranate jasmine facial peel not all you expected it to be? Was the spa playing Enya? ORRRR could it be your childish denial of your own grief and sorrow due to the dead boyfriend/psychotic stepmom combo? Dish to someone who really cares: Jack!

Smirky Magee

Oh my god, Margo is such a bitch! And yet, she, of course, is the one that keeps me riveted to this strip, in all her smirky, petulant glory. I mean, look at Lu Ann in comparison. She should be an inconsolable tower of rage right now, spitting with every indignant word, but in reality, she can hardly keep her pointin' finger straight. She doesn't even look upset, really. Her expression in the second panel is more like disbelief that Margo is capable of lying. "How you say words not true??" Ohhh Lu Ann. You've got a lot to learn!

Any Ideas, Jack?

Hahaha! My reaction exactly, Margo. Look how calm and poised she looks in the first panel, and then how intensely worried she looks in the second. I'm going to go out on a limb here, Jack: do you think Lu Ann is perfect for the job because she's the only artist you know? Because I'm sure you could find a couple more in New York friggin City.