Drawing is Hard Work...if you're 95

WOW!  We've been working for five hours and all we managed to accomplish was putting in the all important Baby's First China Hutch.  The New Little Gaines is coming into the world with a set of bone china that serves 12.  After that, another two hours was spent crumpling paper next to the paint can.  I hope that hutch has an extra shelf for the baby to sleep on because this nursery looks extremely unfinished.  I'm starting to think Frank chose to follow the Margo/Scott Nursery storyline because otherwise he'd have to draw trees, flowers and benches if he had chosen the Tommie/Nina walk through Central Park storyline.   Poor old guy.

Don't Be Silly

First of all, I would be remiss if I didn't mention that we Ladies of the Blog recently received a gift from one of our fans. Remember a couple of weeks ago Margo said something bizarre that I said would be perfect stitched onto a pillow?



Thanks to loyal commenter Ken, that off-hand comment has become a reality, as well as a handsome throw pillow. He's even captured Nina's tiny T-Rex arms and Tommie's classic broken wrist finger point. Thanks, Ken!

On to today's strip!

HA HA HA, oh that Margo. "I just don't want to get paint on my favorite shoes." Ha. You know what? That phase would look PERFECT encrusted in gemstones on a diamond tennis bracelet. Right guys??

Gosh!

This is the most quaint language I've seen in this strip in awhile, which is saying something. When did Margo become so demure, anyway? Kick his behind? Is that code for something unspeakably violent? Gosh, first you kick his behind, next thing you know his slippers and cocktail won't be waiting for him when he gets home.

You know what a hormonal Nina probably wouldn't like? Coming home to find her husband decorating the nursery and spilling all of their marital problems to another woman. I'd kick his behind, too.

Let Me Guess

"Yes, furious! She got up to run out of the room, but I pointed out that with her swollen ankles, she wasn't going anywhere. Then she got really mad and started throwing things at me! She could hardly land anything on me, so I simply observed that she probably should be spending more time at the gym! Then she started whining about how she thought I wanted her to be more emotional, which sounded so much like her mom, which I also told her. And then I called her a selfish cow. I DON'T GET IT!"

Oy. But hey, here's something that's actually a little interesting: on of our readers, Megan Bakaitis (no relation to Megan who blogs here), runs a blog about adoption called http://earthstains.blogspot.com/. This week she's running a special on Lu Ann! Lu Ann recently found out she was adopted and that Ruby was her birthmother, and Megan is highlighting that revelation with some insight of her own. It's kind of a lot more interesting that this is right now, so check it out!

Meanwhile in South Dakota ?!?! PLEASE!

Why would you say a thing like that?  To further tease us about the potential of an affair/ANYTHING happening in this storyline?  He's probably just glad so that he can surprise her with this pastel blue nursery and a baby shower.

Rough Delivery

A new fad is trending in New York City: walking!! Everyone in A3G is getting in on the action. I can't wait until this new craze hits my hometown! But with that out of the way, we can get down to work on the nursery. I'm glad everyone has worn appropriate clothes, which means: the exact same clothes you wear anywhere else.

Central Perk

Being pregnant has certainly made Nina look more like Gidget every day.

I rest my case.  If you're going to make Nina Gaines waste time going nowhere, she's going to punish you by making you waste time going nowhere with her.

Now for Something Completely Different

I don't really have anything to say about this, because it's so beautiful out right now, I can't help but think all my problems would be solved if I could just shut my laptop and go wander in the sunshine for a while. I can just picture Nina out in sunny Central Park, spinning around in her maternity housecoat, all her troubles falling away like cherry blossom petals. Annnnnnnnd then the labor.

Everybody Cries in Spring

Imagine! Caring about lost dogs, or really, anything but myself! It's like I'm... human! Next thing you know I'll actually give a crap about this parasite growing inside of me!

All kidding aside, I'm loving how the puppet dances right on cue to Margo's bidding. "That's right, her hormones should be kicking in right about.... now." Of course Tommie's going to think it's springtime that's making Nina all maternal, since her midwife classes were taught in the 18th century or something.

No Harm Done, Right?

I'd like to think Nina is putting on some fake tears so Tommie won't be mad at her for forgetting her appointment/forgetting that she's pregnant, but I bet it's just those womanly hormones acting up. She probably saw a picture of a sad puppy, or read one of those chain letters about drunk driving--you know how women are. Either that, or god she needs a cigarette.

The Prescription

It looks like Tommie's under the influence of some kind of prescription in that last panel.  The sight of the sun clearly means that spring has sprung.  There is no sun during winter.  And of course Nina didn't notice.  It was dark when she went in to work at 5 AM, plus she was putting her cigarette butts out on the sidewalk.  But I have no idea what Tommie has in store for Nina.

Forgotten Appointment

Nina is really trying her darnedest to make this premature pregnancy thing work, between the long work hours, cigarettes, crash dieting and "forgetting" appointments. She probably flushes her prenatal vitamins too. The lovable scamp! I love that she's trying to hurry this pregnancy along, God bless her, but we know this is going to go for at least five trimesters.

Genuine question: do midwives (-in-training...) make house calls? Also, for Nina, shouldn't Tommie just skip straight to making office calls? Nina is no doubt a prolific multitasker. Tommie can just sneak under the desk with her portable ultrasound while Nina's on a call or answering emails. Brilliant.

Also, HEY, is a midwife/nurse the same as an OB/GYN??

Nursery Rhymes

If this were any strip other than A3G, then that first panel would indicate an entirely different type of proposition.  But, only A3G would use the term "friendly companion."  I can't believe Margo has a tool box!  I hope we actually get to see it in action, preferably in a panel of her demoing the spare room at Scott and Nina's, while Nina watches, horrified.

Surrogate

Uh, Scott. That's exactly what she is. A surrogate. Sorry she never wanted a baby! But Margo has a solution for you...

...hormones! I know, it's a real thing, but it would kind of be a shame if this story wrapped up with a deus ex machina shot of oxytocin. So far, increased hormones have just made Nina cry at sad movies, but that's at least an improvement over the way she used to laugh and laugh.

That's Just Nutty!

I would love to see what Margo just said stiched on a pillow.

So, Ninabash 2012 continues, wah wah wah. At least she's dedicated to getting hot after the pregnancy! And anyway, but does anyone think that Margo is enthusiastic about babies because it might entail free labor? "A new life with a brand-new little person... just like Snow White! Just send the little guy out to the mines and he'll bring you back DIAMONDS! Sure, you might have to do some light housework, but the animals help with that. Yesssss..."

Six Month Review

UGH, we get it, Nina is a terrible incubator for her own child.  If you were that concerned you would be home forcing her to eat salads, not out having delicious spiced pasta and artisan bread with another woman.  Although, I am bemused by Margo and Scottie the Hottie believing Nina's latest job performance review predicts her competence as a mother.  "I mean she really delivered that Phillips deal last quarter, so she's got the drive.  Have you tried enrolling her in competitive Lamaze?"

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner (it's Scott)

"Come on in, Scott! Care to join me for dinner?"
"Thanks, Margo, that looks great! Are those... green slices?"
"It's just some pasta, spices, and green slices with a fresh loaf of Wonder Bread."
"Are you drinking Ocean Spray or...?"
"Nope! I slake my thirst with the blood of my enemies. But we do have Ocean Spray."
"Okay! More green slices, please!"

Sunday Recap

Friday, March 9th

Since when do scrubs have turtlenecks and are bright yellow? And aren't you supposed to change those at the hospital? Birthing fluids are not something that I would want to bring home.

I think Rick is envisioning a romantic meal followed by passionate necking, but Tommie put the kibosh on that by wanting to eat one of the least kiss-friendly sandwiches. Why not just go out for a garlic and onion hoagie?

Saturday, March 10th
Uh oh, by the look on his face, it would seem that Rick is not cool with Scottie the Hottie dropping in like this. In the second panel, it would appear he's about to give sad monologue in front of that pink curtain that appeared on the street. And I thought Tommie was going to change? I'm bored...what's happening on the ranch?

Poor Rick

So now we learn that the real reason Rick has been hounding and stalking Tommie is that he's really, for some reason, in love with her, and has nothing at all to do with his hobo boss, who probably long ago forgot about Tommie completely, confusing her in his old age with Justin Bieber and taking credit for launching a teen sensation to anyone who would listen to his scotch-fueled rantings.

I guess what I'm getting at is, who goes through this much trouble for TOMMIE?

Like a Rock

If you don't have the drive for the music biz, Dan Diller will drop you like a rock. A mopey, wishy washy rock that he probably forgot he was holding. Or maybe he just fell asleep while the rock was trying to make up its mind.

Rick Rolled

Am I the only one who thinks that Frank Bolle keeps having this guy bother Tommie because it's too much work to draw Dan Diller's luscious beard every other day? I mean Rick is just Paul Linski/Scott Gaines/Generic Male character. Frank's probably in solitary confinement at Shady Pines, being forced by the faceless bean-counting comic syndicate executives to spend his golden years tracing his old strips for new material. Poor guy.

Tommie is a true artist. This whole business of nickels and dimes just gets her down, man. It's about the music, man. Clearly, no one has told her about benefits of the royalty check.

Nice Surprise

I'm surprised Tommie has the moxie to greet Rick-E with a cheerful "What a nice surprise!" rather than trying to shoulder past him while avoiding eye contact, as I would. It's possible she completely forgot that she's shunned her second life as a recording artist, as she's still doped up on the natural high of midwiving.

So that's it, Tommie?! You're okay with being a no-hit wonder? Actually, I hadn't thought about it until now, but who's paying who for the privilege of recording at Hobotramp Ltd. Recording Studios? Because if Dan is investing in Tommie as a possible hit-making machine (HA HAHAHAHA HAHA oh man), then Tommie is probably obligated to participate in some promotional tours or slutty music videos or something.

Scottie the Hottie

Tommie has never looked more like Justin Bieber than she does in today's strip. Maybe Frank Bolle is trying to tell us that he has a serious case of Bieber Fever.

I could barely stop laughing at "Scottie the Hottie" long enough to post something about this strip. It's just so awkward coming from Nina while she's rocking the latest sartorial options from Baby Frump, but Scott doesn't seem to mind. And Tommie seems like she's just content to watch.

All Meaningless

Oh my god, this is great. Nina is getting frumpier and frumpier everytime we see her. It wouldn't be so bad if she weren't trying so hard to ignore the fact that she's having a baby, but her attitude is like "Baby schmaby, I'm going to live my life!" She totally could've had a glamorous Jessica Alba-style pregnancy, but it seems her body is in total rebellion, her hair blackened and curling up to unbelievable heights, her torso lumpy, a fresh doiley appearing around her neck each morning. Nihilism is her way of coping, I guess. "So it was all meaningless, right? The baby, our marriage, existence in general?"